piebald does it go-kart style

this proves that even distraught emo kids have a sense of humor...gotta love the Batman theme and David Ortiz-esque spit and clap of the hands...I think I need to take a shower now and get ready for band practice.

it's raining mein

oh the fascists will rejoice in the "liberals running the networks cut off our president's broadcast so they could watch their immoral horrible shows"...but then again, the majority of the so-called red states watch those shows and Fox of course did the same thing...anyways whatever, that news conference was horrible, Bush is a total farce and can't answer simple questions without stammering and finding some measly way back into talking points...now I'm about to start writing some reviews...rad.

regardless, I hope my wife does get this shirt...it'd be rad. she's the best, dealing with my uber-stressed self and not skipping a beat...

heavyweight boxers can taste it

so last weekend was a big (not my words) heavyweight (excuse the pun) fight...first of all, rarely are heavyweight fights fun to watch, they're usually boring and hang all over each other after the first two minutes of the bout...this recent match was no exception and was utterly disappointing...now I love me some boxing defense but dude, you're a heavyweight going against another big bastard...YOU HAVE TO PUNCH...the Cuban Eliseo Castillo looked like shit and was totally dominated, well not really, only somewhat...it was a boring match for sure and Wladimir Klitschko doesn't make me feel like he's somehow better now after his two beatdown songs...blah, hopefully there's some good boxing tonight, I could use some aggression.

tasting it.

yes that's what I'm doing. I'm tasting it. big time...lucky for me though I get to go take a few days off in a week or so and travel off to the emerald city known as Seattle...that should be a lot of fun, hopefully I'll actually be able to relax and let the stress melt away...we're going to travel up to vancouver as well which should be awesome...work lately has been, well, exhausting...this release I'm working on is so completely and utterly horribly managed and put together...it's not my department's fault, it's just all the moving parts that our marketing and business folks have created not to mention it's just a big damn release...I'll be incredibly surprised if we don't get bombarded with a ton of issues with this release, if I could escape the punishment my wife would give me, I'd be cancelling this trip to seattle but instead when I get back I'll just kick it on the weekends more often...whee.

anyways, watch out pets, you could get your balls back

my HOA can taste it

so we were cited with "violations" from our HOA community manager...we had a trash can lid under a bush (OH MY GOD! DEATH IS COMING!), our back gate is (admittedly) broken and needs repair, our siding needs to be cleaned (no doubt they were referring to the grass clippings their mowing service wings at our house every time they mow), and our trim needs to be painted...after I called the community manager and told him we're not doing any of that stuff until you address our complaints and calling the president on the board of directors at her home on a saturday (I fucking rule when I'm mad), I have realized that indeed the Nazis have taken over and they are running HOAs in America...I know, I know, the age old argument that they help maintain property value or even increase it certainly has its merits, but who likes being told that their house is in disarray and they must fix it or pay a fine or even not be able to sell their home because they owe the HOA (the nu-clique made up of failed high school football players and busy bodies) hundreds of dollars in fines...my own complaint isn't so much the rude letter but that when I called about snow not being removed it did nothing, we have sand in our parking lot that's been there since the first snow storm, and I called about having our parking lot marked so that perhaps I could feel like I could leave to do something for the weekend and not come home to find the spot I usually park my car gobbled up by my neighbor who has four adults living in a home each of which has their own car (and who takes two front spots)...I'm sorry but if they can't address my complaints why should I address theirs? so they have unleashed the devilish mean guy in me...I will be going to the next meeting and demanding action and when I have some time I'm going to look into how I can raise issues with the board and continuously badger them until they fucking do something...ARGH! and yes this banter probably will result in me not fulfilling all of my rants but damn it, I hate our HOA. and this is fucking just silly...what a dork, terrorist behavior? dude, it's an HOA meeting, there's no such thing as terrorist behavior you stupid realtor.

then again, how disappointed was I when I found out that Pat Sajak is a hard-liner for the right!? ugh! I have tivoed the boxing match last night and almost spoiled it all when I checked out ESPN's site this morning to see the result of the NFL draft...looks like the Redskins picked up some good guys, hopefully they'll straighten out the nonsense with the players being all mad and what-not...oh wait, that would mean the lame owner would have to admit to being a muddling prick...

but the real crisis in China

is causing a DDOS attack against (drum roll please), final fantasy xi...how funny is that?...pissed off, protesting Chinese dudes with so much pissed-off-ness that they bombard a MMOG...haha

star wars buddy icons

come on you know you want some star wars buddy icons

or get some cool star wars wallpaper, ya shizz

*yawn*

get your team sleep gear...wizzicked ya shizz

follow the yellow brick spoof

so today in analyzing some logs for, ironically the people paid to analyze our logs, I discovered a classic User-Agent spoof, specially "Schmozilla/v9.14 Platinum"...as others have noted some lamely rip out the content directly from the Perl Cookbook example and include the spoofed referrer too which is wizard.yellowbrick.oz...haha too funny...after sitting in a torrid amount of traffic once again this morning, I must reiterate the need for jetpacks...and I must say I'm glad I didn't learn how to type on this machine...and holy fucking hell is everyone loud in and around my cubicle right now...GO AWAY and drown yourself like the wet rat you know you fucking are...and you hopefully will know that our moron in the off-white house isn't the only idiot that can't pronounce nuclear...

the nuke option is dumb

this whole thing just pisses me off...so I wrote to dingle berry 1 and dingle berry 2 just a few minutes ago and said:

"Are Republicans like yourself drunk with power? I'm shocked that the party that props itself on its so-called "moral values" would stoop to something this low. Sen. Warner I'm surprised at you, Sen. Allen there's no excuse for your support of this power grab--those are the thoughts I think when I think of Virginia politics. Think back to when the Republicans weren't the dominant party, would you have wanted YOUR voices silenced? Unless I'm mistaken fascism is out not back in. "

why not join me in voicing your opinion on yet another Republican hypocritical power grab...

you know you're a moron when...

So last night I came home to the wonderful sight of shredded paper all over my lawn...now I'm sure you're all wondering how in the world that happened...well my neighbor had dropped a paper catalog of some sort on their lawn...but instead of picking it up and throwing it out, they let it sit there...FOR DAYS...now I could have picked it up, but I also COULD wipe their asses for them as well...I choose not to do either...so they went to mow their lawn for the first time this beautiful spring and well why PICK up and throw out the catalog WHEN YOU CAN FUCKING MOW IT?!?! maybe they're retarded and annoying son is old enough to mow the lawn now and he did it...regardless I'm rather annoyed that their mess is all up in my shit...perhaps a letter to our HOA...? that just seems extreme, plus I'm not a tattle tale...I'm just a mean old dick...

so anyways one of my team members gave his two-week notice which blows since we were already stacked with a subsonic buttload of work...and we were looking for a contractor already to pick up some of the more slack work but have had no luck in finding a person that can breath and chew gum...it's amazing the lack of quality people out there, or at least the lack of quality people that contractor companies have to offer...guess there goes the outsourcing question eh?

also yesterday talked to an old buddy of mine...though awkward, it was great to hear from him...here's to hoping we have more conversations...

sorry this site's going to continue to suffer tremendously as I try to get all my work done...but hopefully Saturday I'll get to see Dane Cook!

and on a whim

feeling a bit sentimental last night I gave an old friend a call...but oddly and ironically I received a call from another old friend last night too...we made some plans although it looks like this upcoming Saturday I'll be trying to see one of my favorite comedians in Dane Cook perform live instead...rad!

yesterday's band practice went pretty well though Carbomb was afflicted with kitty germs and was getting his sneeze-on...also was able to watch a funny tape of this silly grind "band" that I was in years ago called iN'Sink...so funny..."this is our long song"..."give it up for Jimmy it's his first time playing drums in front of an audience and second time overall"...and speaking of the great one, damn if he isn't probably the most talented dude I know in music...he can do anything, bass, guitar, keyboards, even drums...hell I bet he can play one wicked djembe!

this afternoon is my fantasy baseball draft that I do annually with my dad...it should be a good time, we have the second pick overall (we were last place last year)...obviously Randy Johnson will most likely go first (though I wouldn't pick his old ass, I bet he gets injured this year!) and we're going to be left with either Adrian Beltre (3b for Seattle) or Hideki Matsui (LF for NYY)...hmm, I dunno, on the one hand Matsui will probably have a career year (it's the last year of his contract) and will probably win the batting title if he can outhit Suzuki (another great Japanese import) but again it's his last year in his contract and there's a bloat of talent at OF more so than third...so I think we'll probably go with Beltre, who's not a bad pick since he led the majors in homers last year and is playing in front of sexson and behind the aforementioned on-base machine Ichiro...anyways wish me some luck

superbutt

so I got a press release today about some German band named "Superbutt"...yeah, that's what they're called...they're all dudes too...no clue what kind of music they are, but check out the press release:

"Die Ungarn sind in ihrer Heimat richtige Stars und erarbeiten sich gerade auch die deutschen Fans durch stetiges Touren. Dafür sind sie trotz der heimatlichen Erfolge bereit, quasi an jeder Steckdose ihre Instrumente einzustöpseln und los zu rocken.

Ein Auftritt auf dem diesjährigen "With Full Force"-Festival, reguläres Airplay auf Viva mit den beiden coolen Video-Clips und erste gute Reviews zeigen, dass die Herren auf dem richtigen Weg sind.

Lasst Euch überzeugen: IGNITE-Stimme Zoli Teglas hat "The Unbeatable Eleven" rasant produziert und die Live-Power der Band bestens eingefangen."

alright! it's in German too! well I guess I check out their website....

shopping cart guy

so yesterday I got a plastic shopping cart at my company's all hands meeting. why? because in a meeting where we were going over comps for our upcoming redesign I noticed that several of the pages including the homepage was missing a shopping cart link. so yeah, that stirred everybody up and thus was born a funny gag gift. it was filled with some gift certificates, candy, a disposable camera, and more importantly silly string and water guns!

so that took up almost all day yesterday which makes me feel behind, so I wanted to come into work early this morning only to sit in ridiculously backed up traffic for over an hour this morning. UGH. band practice is this weekend and then that's followed by baseball draft with my dad. that should be fun. I just hope our team does a little better this year. last night I wanted to watch the Yankees/Red Sox game but it wasn't being shown on ESPN despite the fact that it was supposed to be shown...oddly they didn't even put the score in the crawl or anything! which made me think, oh the game's not going on, well no it happened alright. what the fuck? why would I want to see Tampa Bay vs. Baltimore on ESPN? makes me think there's some fucked up television deal or something...argh! but tonight they like totally promise that a game will be on. whatever. fuckers. I'll clutch my near beer and peanuts and kick it back and boo the yankees and their big stupid fucking pitcher Randy Johnson. redneck motherfucker. yeah I'm psyched for baseball!

delay your watergate sir

oh delay, you watergatin' fool...are you guided by voices too?

anyone know any good fantasy baseball mailing lists?

or even better a good baseball news/transactions blog?...I don't feel like reading espn.com every day and would rather have something come in to me xml style...ya shizz.

strong intentions

I guess first, should we really be surprised that there's some videos that challenge the "official" story of what happened during the Republican Convention in New York City? I'm not surprised that those fucks lied one bit...

band practice was great this past weekend...we're really coming together and starting to jell as a full unit...that's when I personally start to be able to write my best stuff...speaking of best stuff I pulled out some archaic tape recording of some REALLY old pre-Fistagon shit (and I do mean that) with old Mr. Hate on guitar...some of the stuff was pretty good other stuff was horrible but I think Code Red also featured the soon-to-be Fistagon guitarist Mr. Lime/Swallows Human Lives By the Thousands Guy...fun! speaking of band stuff, I think my old band played a show with a hardcore band called Strong Intention...well they just were signed to Goodfellow Records...nifty


I'm tired of being sick. it can taste it...and back to work for me...sorry this blog is boring lately but I've been far too busy to really write any of any use.

top ten things to have evolved?

hey sponges rock dude, like multi-cellular in a non-cell phone way?

lord of misrule

as the Lord of Misrule descends upon us and offers us a measly offering of filk and whispers into our ear that tupac faked his death but unlike any of the prior languages spoken there's stutters of Chabali missing Curveballs but not missing a good pie toss so lick your wounds, pick up your bootstraps, and keep your 2 bucks to yourself

work is tough today, I'm tired and sick and congested but excited for the baseball season. band practice this Sabbath...

a depressing end to an impressing beginning

So I was sad to see Lost this weekend and lose one of my favorite characters, namely Boone, but it was a great and surprising episode...our trip to NYC was a whole lot of fun...the Yankees/Red Sox home opener was exciting but Yankee fans are douches...there was a bunch who would come up and say right into my wife and I's face how much "they hated us" or "you suck"...poets they were not...the profanity was ridiculous and if baseball really wants to clean up its image it would start there first and foremost because I would most certainly NEVER take my kid to see a Yankees game even if I was a Yankees fan...and fuck them...now I'll never like them.

we also saw legendary guitarist and music wizard Les Paul play live and he was unbelievable and we checked out a Russian Vodka Piano bar in midtown that was pretty fun and I finally had a martini that I liked...guess it was the nasty gin I never liked or something?...anyways I got to see Brooklyn Bridge and Central Park finally which was fun and laugh at my father-in-law buy 50lbs of kielbasa from some Polish meat market that he likes...hearing people wonder if they're smelling meat was funny...the trip was exhausting and I came back with a bit of a sore throat which is slowly starting to feel a bit better...

work's gonna be tough these last two days of the week, and hopefully we'll have ourselves some band practice this weekend...wicked sick, call the janitor.

DeLay is a dick

First off, Tom DeLay is a dick for suggesting about the judges involved in the Terry Schiavo case:

"The time will come for the men responsible for this to answer for their behavior, but not today."

but then again it's a bag of douche to take a title away from Ms. Wheelchair too...what a weird April Fool's Day it's been...was CNN fucking with us earlier when they posted that Italian news said that the Pope was dead?...oh well. the weekend is almost upon us. this day can taste it.

gmail turns 1

Gmail turns one, with a very funny little splash screen telling us that they're now going to offer 2GB of storage plus other stuff...I love gmail's interface, I think it's highly user friendly and easy for anyone to use...the only problem with it is that I want to not have an @gmail.com domain name, instead I want to use MY domain name...heck, I'd pay five bucks for that option and we all know my feelings on five bucks...I know I could forward my current email account to my gmail account but it's not the same damn it.